LATEST: Queen Seeks Asylum in Australia

The Queen is in Australia for the Commonwealth Heads of Government Meeting in Perth, and in what may be her last trip here has made visits to Melbourne, Canberra and Brisbane.


It would come as no surprise to people in the UK that her visit has reignited the debate about whether Australia should become a republic. Except it hasn't. A handful of leading republicans have been wheeled out by the media for comment, trotted out some of the usual arguments, and have then gone away; and whilst the response has garnered a good deal of nodding in agreement, by and large the more common response has involved shoulder-shrugging and a lack of interest. As Prime Minister Gillard said this week, the republic debate is just not part of the national discourse at the moment (unlike her chronic incompetence).


Meanwhile, the Premier of Western Australia is holding a massive bbq for the Queen in Perth. 100 000 people are expected to attend. Really. 100 000. That's a lot of sausages.


The apparent slump in interest in a republic can be explained by the fact that Queen Elizabeth is clearly held in high esteem here; also, the visit of the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge to the flood ravaged parts of Queensland earlier in the year was also very warmly welcomed and the two are also clearly popular with many. 


Certainly many people think that the Head of State should not be English (and a bit German?) and dwell on the other side of the world. A bigger issue though is what to replace the monarchy with - and in this, the devil is in the detail. There's the problem of agreeing a mechanism to replace it (and the need to agree the mechanism for agreeing that mechanism, which was a problem last time around); that's aside from questions like what to do about the flag, the anthem (yes, change that for sure), the cost of it all, and possibly more besides.


 I think the the popularity of the Queen is a primary factor for the lack of interest at the moment, but there are other contributing reasons for why Aussies seem to have no stomach for a new debate at this time (I have no doubt that will change when the monarch does). 


Firstly there is a deep and widespread disillusionment with the current crop of politicians (in the light of which, having a largely irrelevant and distant Head of State appears a blessing), and secondly that there are bigger and more pressing issues in Australia right now than that of monarchy v republic.


The economy remains a genuine concern, the carbon tax debate rumbles on........ (I just checked again and I can confirm that the sky is indeed still up there) and the government's asylum policy is in tatters. The federal government seems to lurch from one crisis to another. The Leader of the Opposition is popular because Julia Gillard is one of the most unpopular Prime Ministers in Australian history: he's certainly not popular because of what he stands for, as he doesn't appear to stand for anything, but justs says "no" - to everything. In a satirical piece by HeathenScripture on a blog post entitled "Her Majesty the Queen versus Steve Irwin", Tony Abbott was described as someone who "would send back Willy Wonka’s golden ticket with an angry letter".


In one of the worst cases of Fox News-style gutter journalism, this week a "current affairs" programme broadcast a piece about asylum seekers supposedly living in luxury at tax payers' expense; it was, in the view of ABC MediaWatch's presenter, the worst case he has come across in his time on the programme and MediaWatch's excellent critique of it is well worth checking out. 


Given the absolute luxury that the Australian government seems to afford asylum seekers (according to Channel 7) and the austerity measures in the UK - not to mention her clear popularity here - surely Queen Elizabeth should simply seek asylum in Australia? In fact, yes, the Queen is seeking asylum here. Following the journalistic principles of Channel's 7 and 9, if you simply state that something is a fact, that makes it actually true, right?


Finally, two great skits from Clarke and Dawe; the first on the world economy and.... well, you just have to watch the second one....